A Naughty Splash Of Ink!

The curious case of the missing underwear

2010-11-21T18:46:00.001+05:30

I have been warned by my sisters not to blog about this which is specifically why I decided to write about it, for the sheer joy of irritating them and doing something I’m not supposed to do. Anyway, I’m posting it here, saying my last prayers.

Let me first introduce you to the characters and the setting of this story.

N : My cousin sister who works from home.

L : Another cousin sister, who works away from home.

M : Our house owner who works from home, who ogles at anything remotely female.

V: His wife who works away from home (work timings 9AM to 6PM).

It was yet another hectic day at work for me and I keep checking my mails to see if any new issue has popped up or if I got any good forwards.

Among the bunch of new mails, I found this specifically interesting mail from my cousin which read “Help!!!! Serious problem!” She had copied L also in the mail.

I eagerly checked the contents of the mail and this is exactly what it said:

‘I was putting out the clothes to dry. My underwear has fallen into M's balcony!!!

How do I get it from him? Thought of dropping a towel so that it covers it but there is no guarantee that it will fall into the right place.

So please suggest how I can get it back without talking to you know who.......................’

It was a serious issue indeed considering M’s character and that he was the only one at home. N couldn’t possibly go to his house and ask “Excuse me but I happened to drop my underwear in your balcony. Could you help me get it?” He would surely oblige to help but I wasn't sure if that was the best option to go for.

Personally, if it were me I would’ve just let him have it. He probably would wonder who it belonged to and maybe throw it away (that’s the most decent guess I could come up with! ;)).

Well, what are cousin sister’s for. The first reply came from L in less than 2 min and it had these options:

1. Wait till evening.. till such a time that V comes back and then ask her

2. Say Par's stuff has fallen down.. or maybe mine (not a very good idea but still)

3. Put the towel down and try anyway

I don’t think point # 2 is that good an idea. After all, you shouldn’t be embarrassed to own up your own underwear!

I suggested that she should forget about it and move on in life which I’m not sure if she appreciated so much.

Anyway end of story is N did not ask for it back even after V got back home. She decided to let it go.

A wise decision I’d say, although we still wonder what happened to it and where it would be!

Sania - Mirza? Malik?

2010-04-06T23:53:00.003+05:30

“Love is blind and lovers cannot see the pretty follies they themselves commit.” Too bad the rest of us can!

The recent ‘Sania-Malik wedding announcement’ and the controversy that ensued is flooding the news and is indeed getting spicier by the day.

Ms Mirza, the 23 year old tennis sensation of India, in her search for the perfect groom seems to have abandoned the game.

Can’t blame her. She has been busy all year with engagements and breakups happening one after the other. Her six month engagement with childhood friend Sohrab Mirza ended citing incompatibility as the reason. And her wedding with Shoaib Malik was announced two months later. All was well until a Hyderabadi woman Ayesha Siddiqui claimed to be Malik’s first wife.

The poor guy says he was cheated by the lady (who he had never seen) with whom he had a 'telephonic' relation. It seems she sent him pictures of a slim, beautiful woman claiming it is hers and he fell for it. To add to the fun, he even signed a blank ‘Nikah Nama’ for her.

I can’t seem to judge Malik’s credibility but I’m glad Sania supports her lover and is looking forward to the wedding on April 15th.

To dodge Ayesha’s father who has been asking for a divorce for his daughter, the couple shifted the venue of the wedding from Hyderabad to Dubai.

Lets wait and watch as this media drama unfolds.

Ayesha? Sania?

May the best man.. err.. woman win!

Big Bazaar Bonanza

2010-03-29T23:51:00.001+05:30

Guess what the talk of the town is– the new offer big bazaar (Trivandrum) has come up with.

I visited big bazaar yesterday and the offer goes like this. You can take any kind of junk there and get it exchanged for discount coupons!

I have seen a couple of stores do this before for promoting their sales but this one was particularly interesting. Generally the ‘conditions apply’ clause along with these kinds of promotions would be severe but in this case, it was very relaxed. They would take anything and when I say ‘anything’, I’m not joking. They take ANYthing!

I was pretty amazed by the number of people flocking the store with loads of junk from their homes – pretty much like a ‘spring cleaning’ season here in Trivandrum. By the time this offer gets over, Trivandrum is going to have some really clean homes!

But another interesting thing I noticed was that it’s probably not just the homes that might get cleaner, it’s the roads too. I saw a man picking up a scrappy piece of mudguard lying on the road and giving it to the store along with a sack full of other stuff (from his home I presume). This offer might just turn this place into the ‘green, clean’ city we’ve just talking about for years now.

A very intelligent guy even brought a broken toilet to get it exchanged for coupons. (No exaggeration here. I saw it with my own eyes!). People are bringing in heavy stuff like toilets and old computer monitors because they give coupons based on the weight of the stuff exchanged! Oh yes I couldn’t even think of lifting the first monitor we had bought. We should’ve kept it to get it exchanged for coupons!

But this offer has turned big bazaar into a big, noisy market place. There are huge queues in all counters and people are continuously shouting out offers over the PA system which kind of rings in your ears after a while and it made my shopping experience miserable. It was like they were desperate to sell their stuff! “I don’t want your buy 2 and get 2 free” offer, “I don’t want a split ac and get my second one discounted”.

I just wanted to finally get out and as I was waiting to pay the bill, I heard someone ringing a bell continuously and the orange-blue uniformed big bazaar employees shouting out loud “orange rupees twenty a kilo”. A maketing strategy straight from the ‘Palayam Market’ here in Trivandrum. It should work inside Big Bazaar too. In fact it did, as soon as the bell started ringing, a bunch of people rushed to the spot to get their oranges cheap.

But that was it! All that noise made me sick and it was like my turn to pay the bill would never come!

Finally, after paying the bill and getting out of that place, I heaved a sigh of relief, took in some fresh air and vowed to myself not to go back in there ever again!

Is se sasta or achha kahin nahi?? Makes me think. Does it really matter??

Goodbye Chennai

2010-03-11T07:32:00.002+05:30

I can’t believe that my stay in Chennai has come to an end. Two and a half years in this big city has definitely been a wonderful experience. Ok, not all of it was wonderful but yes most of it.

I’ll miss this place and probably the little joys that I found here.

Chennai is definitely a nice place to be. People complain about the extreme climate here but you get used to it after a year :)
I’d love to write more about Chennai but I definitely need to get packing.

Can’t wait to see what Bangalore holds for me.

Change is inevitable. Places change. Things change. People change.

Change is good.

A dumb experience with a 'Smart Card'

2010-01-26T23:51:00.002+05:30

Recently I was travelling from my native back to Chennai when I happened to meet my onsite coordinator from my previous project who was going back to Chennai in the same train as mine. I had not seen him in person before (Oh well he was in the US busy outsourcing work to us) but I recognized him from a team pic I’d seen sometime back.

Talking about onsite coordinators in the IT field, they’re these special people at work whom we would’ve never seen but interestingly spend hours talking to- about some client requirement of course. But yes, a software engineer on an average spends a minimum of 5-6 hours a week talking to his/her onsite coordinator. It is sometimes interesting to think that you can actually argue, fight and make up with someone you have never ever seen. Yeah, interesting role these onsite coordinators play in our lives! :p

Now, coming to my story, I met my onsite coordinator SK at the station, talked for five minutes there, boarded the train and reached our destination and got off at the Chennai Central station on a Monday morning. We did not see each other while getting off the train (we happened to travel in different compartments) and I just made my way to the local metro station right across the road to catch my train to work. The Chennai metro let me tell you is incredibly efficient and you got trains coming in every 10-15 minutes to take you anywhere in Chennai. But I must say the ticket queues can be pretty frustrating at times. There have been times when I’ve had to strain real hard to find out where the queue ends (Ya ok. Go ahead and blame my height for that! But it is indeed a tedious task to get the ticket!)

To provide some relief to the people waiting in long queues, they introduced train ticket vending machines in important stations and my station had two of them. You get these magnetic cards called ‘Smart Cards’ which you can recharge and use to vend tickets from it. Generally, there won’t be huge queues in front of these vending machines. So I decided to vend my ticket from the machine as I sneered past all those people who did not have ‘smart’ cards and were waiting in the long queue for their tickets. As I walked towards the machine, I found SK there waiting in the queue. Out of courtesy I waved my smart card at him and said I’ll help him get his ticket too. He happily got off the queue and we walked up to the vending machine. I noticed one of those machines was not working. Giving SK a confident smile, I used my card in its twin and the worst happened! It gave me a message in red saying ‘Sorry this machine is out of order’.

To me, it read ‘You really look like a jackass now!’ I gave SK a sheepish smile. He seemed a bit annoyed at me. He had almost reached the ticket counter when I deterred him from his mission and steered him into attaining absolutely nothing! Oh yes I would be surprised he wasn’t pissed at me for that!

Yet again, I suggested to him that we go and join the queue which had by then increased kilometers-fold. I guess he wasn’t open to any more of my suggestions. He said he was gonna take a bus back home, trying to hide all his irritation. I picked up my backpack and sadly walked to the end of the queue trying my best not to look at a single person whom I had sneered at before.

Things never work when you really really want them to. I have experienced this kind of a thing many a times before and this incident was just a repetition.

Smart cards they call it!

Ha! I don’t think so.

Or why blame the card. They should make smarter machines to use them I guess!!!!

'3 idiots' make a lot of noise!

2010-01-05T21:50:00.000+05:30

There has been a major confusion in splitting up the ‘credits pie’ between the movie makers and the novelist and the ‘3 idiots’ copyright controversy that has been causing quite a row in the media these days. I happened to read Chetan Bhagat’s blog today.

I have read the book ‘Five point someone’ and now watched the movie ‘3 idiots’ and it was indeed pretty sad and shocking to see the ‘blink and you’ll miss it’ credit line ‘Based on the novel Five Point Someone By Chetan Bhagat’ written in a teeny tiny font move up the screen at the end of the movie.
I have not keenly followed the promos of this movie but I remember it was publicized to be an adaptation of the book ‘Five Point Someone’ long before it was made. Although, I can’t resist saying that the name of the movie- ‘3 idiots’ is absolutely ridiculous. I still wonder what the director was thinking when he thought of this name for the movie. The 3 guys obviously are the center of the story but they’re definitely not idiots!

Bhagat, in his blog, claims to have been ‘grappling with it for two years, but kept silent about it.’ Why did he have to ‘grapple’ with this issue for two long years!! What was he waiting for?
The movie to be released and become a big hit and not see his name in it in the beginning and then complain??? He says he was not shown the final script or the movie before it was released because he was tricked into believing that the movie was ‘original’.

I’d say that if they had bought the rights of his work from him with the intentions of making a movie out of it, he should realize that the movie would have ‘something’ to do with the book!
This movie was publicized as being an ‘adaptation’ of the novel long before it was made and that should have given him some curiosity to check what it was about and in case he was not given any insight into the developments of the movie as he says, he could’ve made some noise or gone to court or whatever at that point in time.
Even though the story framework, the characters and the theme of the movie are completely taken from the book, the movie script is absolutely beautiful and some of the dialogues are totally marvelous. Incredible work of Abhijat Joshi and Rajkumar Hirani. Great work you guys!

The movie producer Vidhu Vinod Chopra definitely overreacted at the press conference on being questioned whether his movie was an adaptation of the novel. And the unbelievably stubborn man was not even ready to apologize immediately to the reporter whom he shouted at and he needed a day to think it over and apologize. I liked his apology though. He agreed that he was being ‘silly’, was ‘behaving like an animal’ and that his behavior was ‘nonsensical’. You are spot on on that one Chopra!

Interestingly he also said that he never wanted to meet Chetan Bhagat again ever again! I think he just busted his chances of making some good movies out of his books.

It was indeed scandalous to say that the movie was just ‘very loosely 2-5%’ inspired by the book. A lot more than that was definitely taken from the book. The characters, the basic story line and theme. We have to give that to Bhagat. The blog shows the writer’s disappointed state of mind and I’m sure a lot of his fans will sympathize with him. Personally, I don’t think he was looking for fame but probably a bit of recognition.

Anyway, the way I see it, this controversy might just spark up the sale of your book again now, Chetan!

Your book was excellent. So was the movie.

I think all this controversy just does a lot of comparison and spoils the fun!

Or maybe Bhagat was totally uninspired after ‘2 states’ that he wanted some entertainment in his life which could eventually come out as a book! Where better to search for inspiration than in Bollywood!

Go write your next one Chetan! Now would be a great time to start!

The Vettaikaran Experience

2009-12-31T11:47:00.003+05:30

Went for the Vijay starrer Vettaikaran with a huge gang of friends.
What do you know, I totally enjoyed the experience! And mind you watching a commercial Tamil movie is indeed an ‘experience’.

Around 20 of us managed to get seats only in the front row of the theatre but decided to watch Vijay and his absolutely unrealistic stunts at close range and drive the movie to success. The guys sat in close range solely to watch the heroine, Anushka shetty and her ‘stunts’ of course.

One of the interesting scenes in the movie were I'd say, when our hero Vijay jumped off a waterfall and escaped unhurt. Now, we have seen that in a couple of Hollywood movies as well. So I couldn’t appreciate that so much.

One time, he breaks a massive cement pillar into dust and yep the slow mo effect of the cement breaking into small pieces and turning into dust was great.

There’s this scene where Vijay does some 2-3 somersaults in the air and lands on a horse that was nowhere around when he started somersaulting. Awesome!

Our movie hero’s can do almost anything. Our hero shoots the driver of the van he’s chasing and miraculously the van flips in the air and overturns. I wish I could do stuff like that!

Then there was this scene where the heroine was captured by the villain and kept captive and our hero negotiates with the villain to get her back. It goes like this. The villain and Vijay sit face to face with a table in between them which has a bottle of pure spirit and 2 glasses. The villain keeps talking and our hero, untainted by the words of the villain, coolly keeps drinking pure spirit, glass after glass. In situations like these you should always anticipate something big from the hero. Vijay then took a cigarette and lit the lighter and when we least expected it; he just blew over the fire and thus started a fiery tornado that gulped the villain! I was like ‘wow’ when I saw that. :D I was totally not expecting that one! Impressive!

The day before Vettaikaran was released; most roads here in Chennai were blocked because of the Pooja and related ceremonies that were being performed for the movie to become a success. Somehow these kinda things promote the movie better than banners or advertisements, I feel. And obviously there will be huge cut outs of Vijay in different poses all around the city such that you turn anywhere and there he is reminding you to watch his movie.

I even read reviews that said that the movie ‘Avatar’ was no where close to ‘Vettaikaran’. I’m sure James Cameron would stop making movies if he read that one!

Another thing is you go for movies like these keeping your brains at home and just for the sheer pleasure of being in a group- whistling, howling and throwing pop corn up in the air when the hero/heroine makes his first entry etc

After this movie, a lot of people in my group were complaining of a headache though. The fight scenes just blast your ears and it did have some unnecessary songs in it here and there but what use would Anushka be of in the movie if she dint get to wiggle to the tune of a couple of numbers.

Overall I think it was a fun movie. Now, I’m waiting for the next Rajni movie to be released! That should be even more fun.:)

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As the year 2009 comes to an end, I have not made any New Year resolutions this time. Because, out of experience, resolutions just remain resolutions unless I probably make a resolution to fulfill these resolutions!

Right now, let me just wish you all a Happy New Year!

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Sad.. Really Sad.

2009-11-11T13:23:00.003+05:30

A patient suffering from kidney failure manages to reach the hospital gates on time but ends up losing his life because he fails to get ‘into’ the hospital on time. And this is because he has to respect and live with the security measures taken to protect our prime minister, who happened to be attending a convocation ceremony in the very same hospital. Yes, this is a news we all woke up to last week and as ridiculous as it sounds, this is something that we live through in India and probably don’t even care to do anything about it.

Obviously, the security of the prime minister is definitely a matter of huge concern, especially in a country with a history of two assassinated PM s (Interestingly one by her own bodyguards), but what is the point if this is done at the expense of someone else’s life? Whoever it is, a VIP or a common man, the loss of a life causes the same kind of grief to his/her family. Although in case of the former, you may be able to see a more elaborate version of the happenings in the papers compared to the latter. It was rather surprising to see that more importance was given to the details of the apology letter the PM sent to the grieving family rather than the actual loss of life.

It is indeed a privilege to receive your degree from the Prime minister of your country but was it really necessary to hold the function in the hospital itself when it is obvious that the security could hinder the normal functioning of the hospital?

I wouldn’t be surprised to see a news in similar lines in the papers days from now. Because, all the sympathies, apologies and blame games for the lost life is over in a week and everyone’s ready to forget it.
I sometimes don’t understand the unnecessary attention and importance given to VVIPs in our country.

This post is a tribute to the bereaved family.

Just hoping that incidents like these wont happen again. A mere hope.

A link to the news: http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/chandigarh/PMs-security-claims-patients-life/articleshow/5194254.cms

GO GO GO!!!!!!!!!

2009-11-01T10:14:00.002+05:30

I often like to think of myself as a “superhero” woman, kinda like a Charlies angel or a powerpuff girl- fighting crime and arresting the bad guys and all that. I got an opportunity to be one recently but damn! I wasn’t that great at it.

I was coming back from work one day. I drive my bike from home to the bus stop as it’s about a km away. I was riding back home on my bike when I was stopped by a girl, probably my age. She jumped right in front of my scooter and obviously I had to stop. She seemed completely hysterical and was talking over the phone in telugu which I obviously dint understand a word of. I wondered what her problem was and why she stopped my bike. Well, I dint have to think for long about that cos the next thing she did was jump onto my scooter as pillion without even bothering to ask and asked me to drive!

Well, now I started getting a bit worried especially cos suddenly the news of the abolition of sec 377 of our penal code in the papers jus flashed in front of my eyes again! What the hell did she want???? For a moment I thought that all my worst fears about the new act were coming true.

Again, I dint get much time to think about what was going on. She said “GO GO GO.. A guy snatched my bag and he went that way!!”. Phew! Honestly I was happy to hear that...hear that it was only that. Still in a trance I drove in the direction she pointed at to “chase the guy who snatched her bag” (What was I thinking!). This happened like a 15 seconds drive away from my home. Just as I took the turn to the lane where my home is, we saw a guy on a bike taking the next turn and disappearing from our view. This mysterious girl sitting behind me yelled “That’s the guy. Follow him!!” All this while, she was calling different people over the phone and telling them that her bag was stolen (Again, I dint understand a word she said but I presume that’s what she said cos you generally don’t call up people at such times and talk about the cute guy next door)

Suddenly I felt like this superhero Charlie’s angel and I drove fast to chase this guy. As I raced past my house or rather the sight of my house woke me up from my daze and my brain started working again. “OMG what the hell are you doing chasing a guy on a bike!” I told this girl that it wasn’t really a good idea for us (2 girls- oh yeah I’m strong but this girl was a skinny little insect) to chase a guy on a bike. She wasn’t ready to listen though. Then I told her it would be dangerous if he was armed. Man! it was tough convincing her but after listening to a bunch of my made up scary stories, she finally agreed .

I enquired what she had in the bag and she started listing them out in this exact same order
1. A lunch box
2. A water bottle
3. A notepad and pen
4. Around 150 Rupees in cash
5. I was eagerly waiting for her to talk about a credit/debit card in her list..... but the last thing she said was a pack of biscuits!!

Now, that wasn’t funny. She made me take out all the valour I had in me to get a bag with a bunch a stupid stuff and 150 bucks! I’m so glad I dint follow him further. But out of curiosity, I asked her where she keeps her cards. She said she never carries her cards in her purse and that she only carries money!!!! (with a dumb smile)

Initially I thought she was being stupid but after hearing this I felt pretty stupid myself and felt sympathy for the guy who managed to steal her bag! He probably would bring it back and give her some money seeing the pathetic state of her purse.

Anyway let’s see the good in it.... ahhhhh theres pretty much no good in this one. Jus managed to get a blog post out of it. Fair enough!

I watched 'Wake up Sid'

2009-10-11T00:07:00.007+05:30

Phew that was a big blog break……
Hibernate season over Par………
Time to get up and start writing again......
This is for a start….. or rather a continuation..

Watched the movie ‘Wake up Sid’ today. It was great. Was pretty impressed by the men in the movie I must say.
Ranbir Kapoor.. I never really liked that guy that much before but hes amazing in this one. Rahul Khanna….. What a hunk!!
Oh ya and for the guys, Konkana is not glamourous but shes charming in the movie.

The theatre was filled with youngsters squealing and howling when the heroes did something ‘heroic’ (You know how it is in the Hindi movies).

But honestly speaking, this movie wasn’t all that superficial unlike a lot of hindi movies I’ve seen, although yes you can predict the second half of the movie when you see the first and obviously everyone is super rich in the movie- the dad owns a great company and expects the son to take over and all that. But the movie is an entertainer with a bit of stuff you could actually take home.
Go and watch it people!

Reactions to an allergic reaction!

2009-08-15T01:47:00.002+05:30

Oh well, I’ve never really had an allergic reaction before. My first experience of it was some 2 days back. I have no idea how it happened but I sensed a weird feeling in the sides of my mouth at around 10 PM. I dint have the time to give it a damn cos I was too busy chatting with a friend over the phone, although yes the weird mouth feeling was interrupting my speech at times.

After some ten minutes, I wanted to see what was really going on and checked the mirror to see that my lower lips were swelling up.

Oh my! and that wasn’t a really good sight.

I informed this to my friend, the one to whom I was talking to over the phone to get an opinion as to what to do; wait for a while and see if it subsides or go to the doc immediately.

Reaction #1:

She asked me again just to confirm, “Is it on your lower lip or your upper lip?”
I reiterated that it was on my lower lip. And the reaction she gave was, “Oh shit! It should’ve been on your upper lip. That way you would’ve ended up looking like a monkey!”
Thanks a ton buddy. Now I know why you’re such a great friend of mine. Phew!
Anyway her answer dint help me get an opinion on what to do.

Reaction #2:

I called up another doctor friend of mine as to know what he thought needs to be done. He heard my problem patiently, typically how a doctor would do it and he thought for a while and said, “Hey Par, I think you should just wait for a while and see if it grows bigger. You don’t wanna miss having an Angelina Jolie pout do you??”
Oh my god! That was the limit. And I consider doctors close to God!
Not anymore!!

Reaction #3:

I called up my sister who is one fifth of a dentist, to know what she thought about it and she said, “I seriously think you should take a picture of it and send it to me tomorrow itself”.
I love you sis for that one!

I wasn’t sure if I wanted any more suggestions, half an hour had passed getting opinions and my lip was swelling up faster than I thought it would.

I thought for a minute…………………………………Angelina pout??????? Aaah forget it!

I rushed to the doc who gave me two shots of some anti allergen and everything was ‘back in shape’.

Thanks to all you people for all the support.
But next time, I think ill just go ahead and take my own decision :D

I've been tagged!

2009-07-25T01:27:00.017+05:30

OK guys, I’ve been tagged.
An old friend of mine with whom I happened to lose touch completely for years and incidentally managed to renew that recently through blogging. I love your posts Bullshee and I promise I’ll be faithful in commenting on them but why tag me??
Anyway now given the opportunity, I guess I’ll just shut up and start writing :)

Four cartoons strips I’d die for

Calvin and Hobbes: I can so relate to that guy!

Garfield: Again, someone I can pretty much relate to.

Dilbert: He’s my latest inspiration (don’t want anyone at work reading this!)

Lockhorns: The perfect couple indeed :D

Four things I sincerely do at work

Chat with a minimum of ten people per day. People in my cubicle call it “extended" project support.

Spend an hour on lunch with friends and a half hour dessert session in coffeday after that.

Google and filter out stuff I need and use even a smaller portion of what I get. Can’t deny it but I owe my job to google.

Coffee breaks at regular intervals to kill sleep and time.

Four desserts I love

Vanilla ice-cream, a brownie and loads of hot chocolate: a truly intoxicating combo. Ooh yum!

Plain cheese cake: You get the best of it at ‘cake walk’ in Chennai.

Palpayasam: A royal dessert after a heavy sadya (feast)

Yummy spongy rosogullas: ya maybe ten of them. Can’t seem to get enough of it ever!

Four Things I Still fail to understand

Topping the list would be the "inflated" male “macho” ego. It is so big that we women generally tend to lie a lot to satisfy it. Why can’t you guys just be normal like us girls :):D
I dunno from which all sides I’m gonna get beaten up for this one.

Why there are people in Tamil Nadu who’re ready to die for movie stars or even build a temple for a movie star. This time I’m dead for sure.

Why the society thinks unmarried girls in their mid twenties are old! The other day my mom was telling me that I’m getting old and I should get married soon. Well, I jus thought, “If I’m getting old, then what you think you are getting?”
(Pardon me for this ma. Down on my knees, kissing your feet)

Why we study so much in school and college to get into a job that has absolutely nothing to do with any of it. I think I’ll jus take Pink Floyd’s advice at least from now on.

Four places I’ve lived in
Bullshee has warned me against using any of the headings he's written on but right now
I cant help but use at least one of his copyrighted headings. Bullshee, hoping that B’lore is pretty far from Chennai and it’ll take you a while to come over here to kick ma ass :P

Trivandrum: Spent almost my entire life there. My first home. One of the most calm and serene places in Kerala (But take my word and don’t dare go near the secretariat building on the day of a strike. You might end up seeing a not so good version of the calmness and serenity!)

Mysore: Spent an amazing six months there for job training. The training sucked but I’m still in love with this place. Great climate, awesome place.

Palakkad: Again a calm and serene place in Kerala where I was born. Go and visit my grandparents there at times and that’s when I realize it is worth taking time to actually smell the flowers.

Chennai: Been here for 2 years now and I actually like this place now. It’s got some of the best eateries, nice people and great shopping:) The Tamils really don’t need a reason to celebrate so there’s always celebration everywhere!

Four of the biggest blunders I’ve committed till date

The first one would be my CTS (Cognizant Technologies) interview blunder. I was so charmed by the smart and young interviewer and I was smartly answering his questions until he asked me the most obvious question “So why do you wanna be in CTS?”
Well, that being a question I’d anticipated, I cleared my throat and started off with my made up reply “Oh well, that’s cos “TCS” is the ……. Blah blah…”
I dint realize my mistake and I kept blabbering about a lotta good stuff about the company and when I ended my speech, the hunk of an interviewer asked me “Did you say “TCS”??” Oh boy I had talked for a minute and it was like suddenly I forgot all what I’d spoken. I gave him a sheepish smile and asked him back “Did I say TCS??” I dunno but that guy was crazy enough to recruit me! Thanks man!

Recently, I was asked to meet a manager for a new project and I was informed that I’d be asked questions on my previous work experience. The manager started shooting out questions and one of them was “So Parvathy, how much would you rate yourself in Java programming on a scale of 10?” Now that was something I’d never though about. But somehow I answered without a doubt “a 9”. Oh boy! Thankfully he dint test my knowledge then but the moment I came out and told my friends about this they yelled at me saying, “James Gosling himself wouldn’t rate himself so high in Java. What kind of a creature are you!” I dint realize what they meant then but being in the project for 2 months, now I know. Any work that remotely uses Java comes to me. Damn yourself Par!

Bunking classes and going to a movie to see my entire family there to watch the same movie!

Once on my way back home, I saw a poor couple with a child. Initially I thought they were begging for alms but later I understood they spoke Hindi and they were lost in Chennai without a way to go back to Mumbai, where they said they’d come from. Now I’ve always wanted to speak Hindi cos whenever I did to my friends, they’d ask me to shut up saying that I have a terrible accent. Now these people wouldn’t tease me so I decided to show off saying “Haan bolo mujhe hindi maloom hai (Ya tell me, I know Hindi)” I talked for a while and finally they started demanding money from me. They asked me for a thousand bucks like they were asking for ten rupees. Finally after a long argument and losing hundred bucks, I got outta there. Man! I never wanna speak Hindi in my lifetime!

Four people I wanna tag would be

Amar: A tech genius who spends all his time chatting and in the end comes up with research papers on complex stuff I don’t even attempt to understand.

Lakshmi: My dear cousin sister who started blogging soon after she started staying with me to show the world what an animal I am.

Deepu: A good friend who recently started writing. Keep going man.

Deepak: A junior from school who loves to write and the first person to comment on my post. Deepak, your turn.

Phew! I had to get this post up before Bullshee wrote his next one. Now that was really “confessed under torture” Bullshee...

Kids are unbelievable!

2009-07-21T00:04:00.004+05:30

Kids these days are too smart. Probably cos they’re born into a hi-tech world unlike us. The first thing my cousin did when her first child was born was to create her e-mail id! Kinda weird but true.

I remember I used play with rattles and dolls as a kid. Probably even get a balloon or an awfully noisy blow-horn thingy if there was a festival happening nearby. That thing makes the most irritating noise; I’m sure my parents would never have bought it for me a second time. Recently, I noticed that my niece got an “electronic math puzzle solver” for her birthday. I hadn’t even heard of a thing like that. I spent a whole day reading the instructions booklet alone.

I notice that kids these days are brought up quite differently from how we were or maybe I shouldn’t generalize. Let me just share with you some of the interesting things I noticed about my cousin’s two kids: 5 year old Amu and 3 year old Krishna.

Amu already knows how to use a computer and a cell phone! She plays all kinds of games in it. Fun with math, making words, catch the worm and what not. I remember it was very recently that I taught my mom how to switch on the computer. When did we ourselves start using computers full fledged??? When we were 15-18??

Amu’s math skills amaze me. Once we asked her “what is 97 minus 23?” She came with the right answer in a jiffy. I would need all my fingers and toes to calculate that; at her age…. Ok… even now!
The truth is I took even more time to validate her answer!
I was thinking of hiring her as my tutor to help me out with my CAT exam.

Talking about smartness, I’d say the three year old amazes me even more. The other day, his mom tried on her new dress and was showing it to us. Suddenly out of nowhere, we heard the best comment ever. Krishna said “Mommy you look like a princess”. All of us including his mom were shocked at this comment of his. After all it came from a three year old. Well, all I thought was, ‘Oh my! This teeny tiny young boy already knows how to appreciate women. He’s gonna be a winner!’ ;)

The height of it all, one day Krish was telling us, “I’m gonna marry Meghna”. Now, who ever thought a three year old would think of marriage. I was dumbstruck by his confidence. Twenty four long years in this world and I’m not decided yet!

Amu has this Barbie doll whose dresses you can change for whatever occasion you wanna dress her up for and once I was about to change her dress when Krishna yelled, “Don’t! She doesn’t have her underpants on”. Now, how the hell did that naughty fellow know that!

Kids never seize to amaze and interest me. But seeing the likes of it, I just hope I can manage them when I have my own!

A messy 'Morning Clean up'

2009-07-01T19:26:00.004+05:30

I had this impression of myself as a tidy and organized person until I opened my refrigerator today morning. Bachelors who stay alone are often compared to animals without a master. I must admit I too have adapted to that kind of a life pretty sooner than I started staying alone and the pleasures of it are unbelievable. But I got a shock when I opened my fridge to get milk for my tea today.

Usually I’ll jus get my milk and close it without even bothering to check what else I have in it. But today I noticed that there were too many vessels in there, all covered with a lid which aroused my curiosity to know what I had in them.

To satiate my curiosity, I stared at the bowls and randomly chose one and picked it up. I opened the lid to find a ‘dal’ curry which I thought hard for a minute and recognized was from a nearby canteen. I had bought it a week back and it had gone bad for sure. It hadn’t started stinking yet. Thanking all the Gods I knew, I forced the goop of slop into a plastic cover and flung the bowl into the kitchen sink. Phew! That wasn’t so bad.

Continuing my exercise, I picked up the next bowl and carefully opened the lid. I quickly realized it was the stir fried vegetables I had made myself when my brother was here for a week. Now which week exactly was he here???? Last?? The one before that?? I think yes, he was here two weeks ago!!… hmmmm this task was not getting better. I tried to slowly scrape off the veggies stuck to the bottom of the bowl with a fork; all the while remembering how badly I had tortured my poor little bro with this crazy experiment of mine. Anyway I managed to empty all my hard work into the same old plastic bag.

The next bowl I took was pretty interesting and different from the first two for the mere fact that I couldn’t recognize what was in it even after staring at the ceiling and thinking hard for five long minutes. There was this soft, uniform and web-like white layer of fungus growing on whatever the bowl contained. Admiring the white cottony layer, I poked into it with a fork to know what it actually was. To my surprise it was the chapati dough that was kneaded, I don’t remember when but seeing the looks of it, probably a month back! And it had stuck to the bowl so hard that I even bent my fork trying to get it out.

The next bowl I took out had rice in it. Now who would’ve known rice could go bad. The rice which was white when I’d made it had turned yellow now and I dint bother to remember when I’d made it. I overturned it into the bag and noticed that there was a yellow slime too at the bottom. Now, let me tell you that stank real bad. ! I said to myself… “Endurance dear .. Endurance”.

Finally, I decided I had had enough and decided not to open any more mysterious bowls today. I checked the fruits cabin and found 2 dead bananas which were yellow when I’d bought them, turned from brown to black over the course of the week. I sadly picked it up and threw it away. There was a mango in it which was still in the process of rotting. So I let it stay until it fully goes bad. I don’t intend to change, people… :D

After this heartbreaking exercise of emptying the fridge, I thought to myself, this is why I need my clean-freak mom to visit me once in a while. But if she had seen the refrigerator today, I’m sure she would’ve freaked out and probably sued me for the kitchen-crime I had committed. She keeps telling me what an animal I am but I never used to agree with her.
But today, Amma, you’re right.
You always have been!!

Inspired!

2009-06-29T21:47:00.007+05:30

You know people, I created this id of mine long time back and I have wanted to write stuff in my blog since a really long time. But I used to think I could never do it and this id has been idle for I don’t know how many years. Anyway let me tell you one of the elements that inspired me to start writing.

Firstly, let me confess I have not been a voracious reader since my childhood. I used to get away with the minimal reading any man would do. The scientist in my dad has tried to get me into the habit of reading by suggesting books. He used to try to get me to read a lot of classics, books on science, medicine and philosophy. I’ve always thought those kind of books were meant to be showcased; not read. Or maybe the ones you’d have a slight idea of its theme so that maybe in a conversation you could show off saying, “Hey I think War and peace By Tolstoy is the best historical novel ever written”. That works most of the time unless the other person has actually read it himself.

Recently he introduced me to ‘The White Tiger’ by Aravind Adiga. Along with giving a book, he has this habit of giving an introduction to the author. It either goes like, “you know, this author has won a Nobel Prize for medicine and his book gives an exhaustive list of his contributions”. Like all that even matters to me. Anyway, without giving up his habit of the ‘author explanation’, he told me Adiga won the Man Booker prize for this book. I said to myself,“Oh No..Not another one!” I was sure it would be just another book where the author tries to show off his skills in writing complicated sentences with unmatchable vocabulary which a common man like me would be able to read solely with the help of a dictionary. Anyway I took it from him and started reading the book. To my surprise, the book was amazing. I dint keep it down until I finished the last page. The interesting part was that I did not have to open the dictionary, not even once, to read it! I’m impressed, Adiga. Thoroughly impressed. That book is written in the simplest language and with a kind of flow I cannot explain. The experience of reading that book was mere pleasure.

So, one thing I inferred from this is that, when you write something, you really don’t need to blow up things and shoot it out with disgusting vocabulary and scare the reader away. Neither do you have to write on complex topics which again could put off people. Even simple stuff can make a long lasting impression. Thanks Adiga! ...........
I finally believe I too can write!

My daily trip to M- city

2009-06-27T23:46:00.003+05:30

People who work in Infosys, Mahindra City, Chennai and stay in the city face the trouble of traveling close to 50 kms everyday (Let me warn you thats the one-way distance). And we do that in this so called first class “Volvo buses”. It is indeed a very difficult journey but at times interesting too. Let me tell you some of the things that fascinate me in our bus journeys to office each day.

There are 3 of us who get on the bus from my bus stop- Mr K, Mr P and me. The bus reaches our stop at 6:45. I always manage to just run and catch the bus. I’ve timed everything that way; from waking up in the morning at 6, to reaching the bus stop just in time for the bus. If a minute is lost in some other activity, then I’d surely miss the bus that day. But interestingly, K and P although they stay farther than me from the bus stop, they reach a lot earlier than I do and even call me up and inform me when the bus is there so that I can run a bit faster! There are some “pointers” for me to know exactly how late I am. For instance, the bus with 'REC' (Regional Engineering college?? I thought they renamed it long back. Naah… This is Rajalakshmi engineering college :D) written on its forehead. If I don’t see the students from REC waiting for the bus as soon as I get out of my house, then I’d rather not walk over till my bus stop because the bus would’ve gone for sure. But there have been times when I’ve reached earlier than them.. ya maybe one or two times.. doesn’t really matter. Anyway the good thing is, K and P being perfect gentlemen, they let me board the bus first. Now you would be thinking why I would be considering that as a big privilege. That’s for the simple reason that our bus is almost full by the time it reaches our stop and it is really difficult to find a pleasing seat.

Now, our bus has 3 seater and 2 seater seats. The 2 seaters are always more comfortable because even if you don’t get the window seat, you’re right side is free and airy unlike the 3-seaters where you’d have to sit in between 2 people and bear their heat (No pun intended). As soon as I enter the bus, my eyes start wandering, looking for a 2-seater seat but I’ve never been successful in finding one all this time. That, my friends, is the first search criteria. The next one is finding a 3 seater with 2 guys in it. Now you maybe thinking what a flirt I am but hell no , its not my intense desire to sit in between two guys but the sole desire to sit in the end of a 3-seater cos it’s a lot cooler there than the middle seat. Generally the guys will be courteous enough to offer the end seat to a girl rather than making her sit in between them. But these days, guys are really frank and they tell you, “I’m a lot more comfortable sitting in the end. You may please sit inside” and they move and offer you the middle seat!.. real sad thing you guys!..

Then the next criteria I look for is to sit in between 2 really slim people. But here too my search often turns futile cos hello… we‘re talking about software engineers who sit in their seats and work for 10-12 hours a day with very small breaks. We are expected to at least have a paunch. (NOM guys. I’m one among you). Ok the point is after using all my analyzing skills so early in the morning, I’m exhausted and finally find a seat of my choice and settle down. It’s a sad thing that K and P end up sitting in the last seat almost everyday! I think they’re really used to and love the last seat bumpy rides by now. I’m sure I’ll lose my privilege of getting into the bus first the moment they read this! So shhhhhhhhh…. ;)
During my first few journeys in the bus, I used to listen to some songs, read a book or a newspaper, call all those people I haven’t met in a while and chat over the phone (remember this is at 6:30 in the morning. They sure would have cursed the hell out of me for waking them up so early). All this, to kill time. But finally I realized the best way to do it was to just sleep and interestingly more than half the population in the bus would agree with me. The next hurdle is to find the right position and just sleep off. Sometimes I manage to get it fast although there have been very frustrating times when I’ve had to stay awake throughout the whole journey and probably stare at someone who’s sleeping peacefully with utmost envy. Although most people sleep through the journey, if the driver steps on the brakes a bit hard, almost all of us wake up cos of the jerk and you can interestingly see a lot of heads popping up from all the seats anxiously to see if we hit the vehicle in front. I can’t forget this time when I got a place in the first seat. Its almost like the driver is envious of all the people sleeping when he has to navigate the bus through intense traffic. He keeps honking so loudly at regular intervals. I remember I even tried to find a rhythm for his honking, trying to match it with a couple of the latest movie songs! It sometimes works you know.

Another thing my friend tells me is the way people sleep. I have a friend Miss B, who never ever sleeps in the bus. Kudos to her. She doesn’t like it it seems. I don’t understand that but she tells me it’s funny to watch people sleep including me. People sometimes sleep with their mouths wide open, jerk from side to side, lean on you completely (dreamin' of mommy???girlfriend?? boyfriend???). I’m glad I haven’t seen anybody drooling till date! Recently K was telling me ‘Hey Paru, my friend was sitting next to you the other day and she said you were sleeping on her shoulder!’. I reacted to that with a slight embarrassment; when he told me later on he saw both of us leaning on each other! He even told me he has taken a picture as proof. Now why the heck would i need that. i believe you completely man. That is something that I see in the bus myself!

Another interesting thing I see is the way some people cover their hair with a cloth. I presume it is to prevent the wind from messing it up or probably to prevent all the pollution in the city from dirtying it. Anyway some people tie it up ‘red riding hood’ style, some like a bandana and some who are more conscious of their health tie it to cover their mouth and nose. But generally I end up looking like I came out of a twister or something by the time I get out of the bus!
Anyway these are some of the things that fascinate me in my one and a half hour bus journey in the morning. I really couldn’t sleep in the bus today morning which is why I wanted to get all this on paper. I hope at least some of you can relate to it.